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Steven Wright. Chybí nám detailnější popis autora.

✵ 6. prosinec 1955
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Steven Wright: 178 citátů0 lajků

Steven Wright: Citáty anglicky

“I went for a walk last night and she asked me how long I was going to be gone. I said, 'The whole time.”

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Steven Wright

“If it’s zero degrees outside today and it’s supposed to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold is it going to be?”

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Steven Wright

“Last night somebody broke into my apartment and replaced everything with exact duplicates… When I pointed it out to my roommate, he said, "Do I know you?”

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Steven Wright

“I was sad because I had no shoes, until I met a man who had no feet. So I said, "Got any shoes you’re not using?”

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Steven Wright

“Sometimes I talk to myself fluently in languages I'm unfamiliar with… just to screw with my subconscious.”

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Steven Wright

When the Leaves Blow Away (2006), I Still Have a Pony (2007)

“Sorry… my mind was wandering… one time it went all the way to Venus and ordered a meal I couldn’t pay for.”

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Steven Wright

“In my house there's this light switch that doesn't do anything. Every so often I would flick it on and off just to check. Yesterday, I got a call from a woman in Madagascar. She said”

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Steven Wright

“You know when you're sitting on a chair and you lean back so you're just on two legs and you lean too far so you almost fall over but at the last second you catch yourself? I feel like that all the time…”

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Steven Wright

“I heard that in relativity theory, space and time are the same thing. Einstein discovered this when he kept showing up three miles late for his meetings.”

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Steven Wright

“I bought my brother some gift-wrap for Christmas. I took it to the gift wrap department and told them to wrap it, but in a different print so he would know when to stop unwrapping.”

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Steven Wright